05/06/13
This is “again” the worst above the worst moments of my infertility journey, being late with my period and then a negative home pregnancy test. How lame could that be? although today is quiet the longest, It’s been merely 2 days since the arrival of what should have been my period but its still not showing up.
I’ve spent the couple of days googling things and symptoms such as sore breast and dizziness and saw results of early pregnancy symptoms; secretly, I’ve been hoping and jumping in glee that maybe this could be it, as obvious as it may seem I am in fact 1 day late and now 2 but this morning was a total bullshit again (sorry for the bad word) because I tested negative again with first response considering that I am 2 days late.
Again, with all the hopes and desire I ended up being sad as hell again.
2 days ago, I thought I would have my period as it was the scheduled day it should arrive but it didn’t so I prayed and cried to God letting him know that I cant handle the pain anymore, the monthly cycle of hoping and losing and hurting. I asked him that if I am not yet pregnant for this cycle, please just let my period arrive that day so no more hope could be added as pain and frustations as well in the end if Im not pregnant.
Why ? why do you have to be late? why?
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